Hysterectomy

Removing the female parts

As I mentioned previously I had a hysterectomy in November. It was quite the operation. In fact, I didn’t really understand fully just how debilitating it would be. Recovery is taking quite a long time. Now, this may be because of my age, I am quite the senior citizen, by societal norms, even though I don’t really feel any different than I did at 25. Or it could be because I contracted that terrible flu which sent me to the ER, shortly after the operation, and thus delayed my healing.

What I found truly interesting was just how many women though, have actually had this operation. It is really surprising. It is also quite the conundrum why no one seems to talk about it. Of course, my girlfriends had mentioned it at the time of their surgeries, but when I went to buy a book to read during my recuperation or when I mentioned it to coworkers, it was as if everyone had had a hysterectomy.

I simply don’t understand why this phenomenon isn’t regularly discussed. Why do we hide it, like we used to hide talking about our periods, or didn’t say the word “vagina.” Ok, some people still don’t say the word “vagina” and use euphemisms when they talk about our menstrual periods, like saying our “friend’ came to visit. But in general, most of society does act like grown ups and don’t really think talking about female physical reality is taboo. Except when it comes to hysterectomies. It just isn’t something talked about openly.

And I can’t figure out another 2 things. Is there something happening to women’s bodies as we age that is natural, and that we see more now because women are living longer, or is there something in our world, either chemically or stresswise, causing women to need hysterectomies.

So what do I mean?

Well, we know that the longer you live, the more likely you are going to have physical issues. And physical issues do surround the uterus. Once we are finished having children, it is basically a superfluous organ that is just biding its time until it peters out. We need to remember that throughout history, until modern medicine, upwards of 50% of all women died in childbirth. It’s why it would be quite natural to see a man married 2, 3 or even 4 times. And when you don’t grow old, you don’t go through peri or regular menopause and have to deal with the hormonal changes in your body. So there really is no way to know if women in the past would have developed the same uterine issues that women today are experiencing.

On the other hand, we hear alot about how the chemicals in our food supply affect our metabolism, hormonal balance, antibiotic resistance and even the havoc that microplastics are now causing. There is a huge brouhaha about red dye finally being removed from food here in the US, but so much is ignored about other possible harms being done. Not to mention BigAg and how they treat animals and what it does to our food supply as well. Stressed out animals cannot be good for our own hormonal imbalance. (No I am not a PETA crusader, not vegan or vegetarian, but as Temple Grandin said about factory farming, “Nature is cruel, but we don’t have to be.”)

So many women have partial hysterectomies in their 40s or 50s because of horrible periods. Not necessarily endometriosis, but the hormones along with growing fibroids are causing painful cramping and very abnormal blood flow. (I had a girlfriend at one time whose cramps were so bad, that doctors told her it was like she was going into labor every month) So the doctor will remove the uterus along with the fibroids to help with that issue.

However, as we get older though the fibroids are supposed to become smaller once we hit full menopause. So they should not be an issue. However that is not what happened to me. My fibroids seemed to grow and then stayed rather large.

Interestingly enough there are also studies that say fibroids are caused by stress, because stress triggers excess hormones and cortisol. These then create abnormally large fibroids which can cause all manner of issue. (Another aside, is that studies were done of mothers of autistic children, and they found cortisol levels equal to soldiers that had been in battle. Probably why my fibroids never got smaller.)

Now what do I mean about issues. Think of a grapefruit size large ball of fiber (or 2 or 3) sitting on your bladder, or colon, extending your stomach and possibly causing digestive issues as well as elimination issues. (However, abnormally large fibroids should net be confused with polycystic ovarian disease - PCOS) Generally fibroids are benign, but you don’t really know for certain until they are removed.

So, I had what is called a total or full hysterectomy. In other words, they took my fallopian tubes as well as my ovaries. This is called an oophorectomy. Luckily, though since I am in menopause I didn’t need any supplemental hormones, since I had gone through the change and basically my ovaries were just sitting there doing nothing.

I have to admit, that I am finally on my way to recovery. I am able to exercise, and was even given the go ahead to restart my core exercises. But let me tell you, 2 months away from exercise has really weakened my muscles and it is no small feat to do 10 minutes of pilates core. Actually since I only restarted I think I may get through 5 minutes daily. And yes, those ab muscles hurt. But at least I know I am working on them correctly or they would hurt in the wrong places.

I am also allowed to up the incline on my arc trainer and can do low impact on the peloton. Can’t do too much just yet, no up and down, sideways or hoopdeedoo movement though. But they will come.

I can pick up things over 10 pounds again which is good. Of course, I only use 3 pound weights anyway, but this way I don’t have to worry if I need to move things around. And I can run errands and not be concerned the heft of the bags I need to carry. (Of course, for anything heavy in the house I have full grown sons living here who I enlisted even before surgery).

It is interesting though when you think about removing the uterus and ovaries and what it means. I will let you in on a secret too, since I had breast cancer I was always worried about developing uterine or ovarian cancer. They say they aren’t connected, but cancer of female organs especially since my breast cancer was estrogen positive and they say that fibroids are created by excess estrogen, does sort of lend itself to worry.

So my next question is does removing these female parts make you less female?

I remember a poignant scene in the movie Erin Brockovich, where she was talking to a survivor (played by Marg Helgenberger) who had had her breasts and uterus removed due to cancer. She asked Erin if after having all her female parts removed was she still considered a woman. I remember that scene and it breaks my heart. (By the way if you really think there is nothing to the issues of what chemicals can do to us, I suggest you watch that movie.)

I guess it comes back to how we define ourselves as women. What distinct things make us who we are?

And of course, I still consider myself a woman, not just because of my DNA, or gametes or the fact that I had had a uterus and ovaries at one point (which are biggies in defining womanhood), but because my life is a distinctly female one.

Nothing is going to change that.

I would admit though it feels a little weird knowing that a distinctly female part of me is gone.

TODAY WE ARE WAITING ON ADDITIONAL 4 HOSTAGES TO CAME HOME ON THURSDAY AND THEN MORE ON SATURDAY. BUT FOR THE REST IT IS DAY 480 OF THE HOSTAGES BEING HELD IN THE TERROR DUNGEONS OF GAZA 🎗️

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