Dichotomy

Contradiction, polarity, disjunction...

Life is not always black and white (oops… are we not allowed to reference this saying anymore? I have lost track of what the language police think is and is not acceptable.). Not that there isn’t alot of gray at times, which there is, but sometimes there is also the issues of pink, blue, magenta, yellow, orange, purple and every color of the rainbow in between.

As you age you realize that not everything fits into a perfect mold like a bundt cake. And for you younglings a bundt cake is circular cake pan with a hole in it, like a cake bagel, that was very popular in the 1970s. You would buy a prepackaged cake mix from the store, probably add a package of pudding mix to the batter, and then pour it into this little round tin. My mother used to make them all the time. They were easy to make and quite delightful to eat.

And believe it or not, I just read that there is antisemitic history behind the use of the word bundt. You can find that article HERE I swear sometimes the world simply sucks. Apparently, nothing is safe from human shittyness anymore, even a freaking cake pan.

Meanwhile, what I have figured out in my lifetime is that not everything is simple. Yes, there are absolutes in this world, mostly found in the ten commandments. But humans over time have found that there are caveats with those as well.

The “thou shalt not murder,” has been upgraded to differentiations of why one kills, under what circumstances, and under what kind of influence. In our modern criminal system there are different levels of homicide ranging from first degree felony murder to involuntary manslaughter, conjoined with self defence, and accidental death.

The same with “thou shalt not steal.” There are types of theft, and the penalties vary depending upon the unforeseen or unavoidable circumstances. Yes, the law holds you to account if you bring a weapon and someone gets shot, or dies during a robbery. That is not unforeseen. Not sure what an unavoidable circumstance would be in the commission of a felony, but I leave it to the criminal bar to figure that out (or not figure that out since it seems the DAs in most major cities like to dismiss burglary and kidnapping charges against certain defendants).

What I have also discovered is that in reality several things can be true simultaneously. Sometimes they are really simple things too. Not every bit of truth is earth shattering.

I can like to eat chocolate cake. It gives me joy, makes my day better, and is fun to share with others. It also makes my ass fatter, gives me reflux, and the caffeine in the chocolate will keep me up at night. So it is a negotiation with God about how much I can eat, if any, and what will be the consequences of my own actions.

This is opposed to “fighting with God,” as Jacob did. In reality, God has very little to do with the outcome of my chocolate cake dilemma. Deep down I know this. (But I say a little prayer anyway) However, if we are created in his image, could he have not imaged us to have better intestinal fortitude? Though that does also beg the question of whether God eats chocolate cake, and if he does, does it gives him reflux as well? But those are questions for another day.

I think as we age, while it is easier to see everything in black and white, especially in this political season, it is important to remember that there are only a handful of ideas and concepts that are anathema to human survival and well being. Most people, at least in the west (I do not live in the east, accept it does seem a part of the east wants to kill me because I hold to western ideals), are simply trying to figure things out so that humanity moves forward and betters itself.

Of course, there is the narcissistic, egocentric, paranoid, sociopathic version of what this all means, but I choose the other path. I am concerned for others. Perhaps that is my dichotomy. I simply would like it to be easier for my sons in the future.

Of course what that actually means for them, beyond being respected in society and being allowed to be selfsufficient, plus the big question of how to get there, is what I mean when I say that issues are every color of the rainbow, not simply black and white. (There are so many schools of thought surrounding these issues that it is not easy to unravel what is best for each individual, at any given time, at any given moment of their lives. It changes sometimes hourly, or even by the minute.)

Moreover, while there are those who for personal, and selfish reasons may support an ideal that you agree with, there are also truly selfless reasons that a person may support a concept. So ideas, beliefs, and desired outcomes, may come with many layers, many tiers, and with many facets to explore, ruminate over, and promote.

Additionally, people may not fully understand the ramifications of a program especially an economic one, (and believe me when I say, financial literacy really isn’t my thing). However they may also completely understand that the outcome of a concept is awful, and not care because the accolades provide the momentary endorphin rushes (or votes) that they need.

Dichotomies abound in life. To hold ourselves to an either/or position is ridiculous. Very few things in life truly are an absolute. The ironic thing is that in our modern society, that which is scientifically absolute some are trying to overturn, while the things that can be multifaceted and nuanced are being thought of in only a 2 dimensional way.

Perhaps, the answer is to keep your own counsel on what you think is absolute and what you think is more fluid. To understand as well, that society does go through changes, upheavals, and at times ridiculousness, perhaps even dangerous eras. That eventually though there is something that comes along and rights that ship.

On the other hand, if you do not openly speak the truth to power, what will ever change, how will society manifest itself, and what will be the future if you do not fight for it? What kind of society are you leaving to chance?

So as we see several things can be true at the same time. It just depends on whether you have enough antacid in the house so you can eat that piece of chocolate cake, or can you get someone to run to the drugstore to get you some (or can you go yourself), or if no one can go out can it get delivered that day (sometimes within an hour or 2 depending on your pharmacy’s service), or if the antacid is not immediately deliverable, do you have the wherewithal to wait for it to be delivered by mail before you eat that really delicious looking piece of chocolate cake ?